Wednesday, December 17, 2008

Too Funny....again!



Jose Cuervo Christmas Cookies


1 cup of water
1 tsp baking soda
1 cup of sugar
1 tsp salt
1 cup or brown sugar
4 large eggs
1 cup nuts
2 cups of dried fruit
1 bottle Jose Cuervo Tequila

Sample the Cuervo to check quality. Take a large bowl,
check the Cuervo again, to be sure it is of the highest quality,
pour one level cup and drink.

Turn on the electric mixer. Beat one cup of butter
in a large fluffy bowl.

Add one peastoon of sugar. Beat again. At this point
it's best to make sure the Cuervo is still ok, try another
cup just in case.

Turn off the mixerer thingy.

Break 2 leggs and add to the bowl and chuck in the cup
of dried fruit.

Pick the frigging fruit off the floor.

Mix on the turner.

If the fried druit gets stuck in the beaters just pry
it loose with a drewscriver.

Sample the Cuervo to check for tonsisticity.

Next, sift two cups of salt, or something. Who geeves
a sheet. Check the Jose Cuervo. Now shift the lemon juice and strain your nuts.

Add one table.

Add a spoon of sugar, or somefink. Whatever you can
find.

Greash the oven.

Turn the cake tin 360 degrees and try not to fall
over.

Don't forget to beat off the turner.

Finally, throw the bowl through the window, finish the
Cose Juervo and make sure to put the stove in the wishdasher.
Cherry Mistmas !

4 comments:

Julie said...

Hahahahahahaha!

Honestly? The only time I've ever been totally sloshed was New Year's Eve my senior year of college. My four best friends and I shot tequila. I felt like I'd been beaten with a stick for two weeks. Years later, when I see a billboard or sign for tequila, my stomach still turns!

crazy said...

these are my kind of cookies lol

Mandy said...

love it!!

also, I love that mug, is it yours?

Maureen said...

Yeah, it's one of my "I refuse to drink out of anything that's not Christmasy during the month of December" mugs.

ps. I do make exceptions for wine glasses :)